This article contains the communication challenges an Indian Spoken Work Perfomer and Poet called, Anamika Joshi used to face and how she was able to eliminate them all.
To start with, let me tell you the issues I used to face:
• I couldn't mix up in any group and got this fear of being alone days before i attended any party or function (Home or Office).
• I realized I wasn't too casual in my approach and used to pay too much attention to what I am saying and whether or not the other person is interested in it.
• I also had this concern about hurting other person's feelings and so I would agree on everything, even if I disagreed completely with what is being said.
Now this is what it resulted in:
• People stopped believing in what I said to them, as they knew that I will never say anything bad. This is the first step to people moving away from you.
• I became less interesting to talk to because of me being too conscious of my conversations.
• I stopped going to places where I barely knew people, simply out of fear and this resulted in missed opportunities and a lack of social circle.
How I overcame my fear:
• It doesn't work like "I will first become confident and then talk to people". rather, it works like "Yes, I am really afraid of doing this, but let me do this and see what happens."
• It's all about coming out of your comfort zone and you would be surprised that after initial embarrassments (which you need to face), you will start seeing the positive side of people who are generally more welcoming than how you perceive them to be.
• Say what you actually believe in, have your own strong viewpoint and stay knowledgeable on certain topics which your circle generally talks about. It gives you great confidence to make a point and establish your presence.
• Travel alone. It really helps. It helped me immensely. I started going to watch plays and movies alone... Something which I dreaded of doing ever before.
• Develop some skills that complement your personality. You wont realize how honest you will feel about yourself. The same will be noticed by others.
Lastly, lack of confidence has nothing (and I really mean it) to do with "weak communication skills". It doesn't matter if you are talking about lack of language skills or presentation skills, it always has to do with how much you believe in yourself.
Sit and think about what could possibly go wrong if you talk to someone or if you are left alone in a party. You will realize that no earth-shattering change would happen, so take it easy.
Laugh at your mistakes. Start enjoying life more than fearing it.
Hope this helps, have a fabulous time head.
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